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The Day Before the First Day

A few stream of consciousness tidbits I’ve lingered on about day one at my new gig for you reading enjoyment :)

  • What’s the dress code in this joint, anyway? Business formal? Business casual? Wait, was she wearing jeans in the second interview? But that was on a Friday… Or Thursday? No, Friday. Do I need to buy new jeans? Does this blazer make my anxiety look insurmountable?
  • I wonder if it runs warmer or colder in there. Should I bring a blanket? Am I going to have an office? Cube? Desk? Chair? They have to give me a chair… I’ll definitely have a chair.
  • On a scale from one to eats-her-own-hair, will bringing my new mustache coffee mug and hand sanitizer and those stickies I like in my first week fall under “adorable and quirky” or “worrisome-ly rooted in her ways”?
  • I HATE TIGHTS. God. Can I maybe get away with… no. It’s January. Stupid tights.
  • Am I likable? Like, will the people there actually like me? And were the people at my other job really sad to see me go? Or did they secretly dislike me a whole lot? No. Shut up, K.
  • Do you think they’ll know that I stole this stapler from my other job? Maybe that wasn’t hilarious after all… Didn’t I just read that white-collar crime is on the rise? Do I need to return it? Am I part of the problem?!? But I don’t own another stapler! What will I use to fasten things?
  • How is it possible that my entire portfolio fits on this USB? Shouldn’t I have boxes? A box, even? A tote bag? Why does technology always make me feel so defeated?
  • How many people are going to tell me I’m tall tomorrow? Probably, like, all of them. Best wear heels and get it over with all at once. But, with jeans? God.
  • I wonder if there’s a Starbucks nearby… I don’t remember seeing one on my drive in. I should check the Starbucks app! Oh…damn. Should have checked before I signed the offer letter…


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